The Flaming Sword!
Reviews, Opinions & Criticism
Where Mathew and the Helm review books, movies, TV shows, music, games and whatever else tickles their fancy or draws their ire.
Kingsman: The Secret Service
2015 20th Century Fox/Marv. Directed by Matthew Vaughn. Running time: 129 minutes. R. Starring: Colin Firth, Taron Egerton, Samuel L. Jackson, Sofia Boutella, Michael Caine
Helm: This was a good and rousing movie!
Helm: We are in 100% agreement. Oddly.
Mathew: There's nothing odd about it. This movie rocked and we both rock enough that we can put our personal differences aside and admit it.
Helm: While I might dispute the degree to which you "rock", I will not dispute that this was an excellent film.
Mathew: You can't dispute how much I rock, because I rock like a rock god. And of course you can't dispute the movie. Great action, great characters, great plot, great fight scenes, great acting, great direction! Just great all around!
Helm: Unlike you, it was great. Although the marketing was somewhat off.
Mathew: Yeah. I agree with that.
Helm: Of course, you agree with that. There is no disputing that you are a flouncing ninnyhammer.
Mathew: Not with that part. I agree with the part about the marketing, not the part about me not being great.
Helm: I agree.
Mathew: Good. Wait... With what?
Helm: Quiet. I am reviewing the film. Based on the trailer, I thought this was going to be a parody of spy films, when, in actuality, it was a first rate spy film in its own right. The secret organization was believable, the villain was well rounded and well conceived. It was a tight, solid spy movie.
Mathew: That's what I thought too. Although, even though I thought it was a good spy film, it was pretty funny too.
Helm: Yes. It was quite amusing.
Mathew: I loved the whole thing. It made me happy to watch it.
Helm: While I greatly enjoyed it, it did make me a touch sad.
Helm: Well, I got to see a diamond in the rough, polished to a high sheen. An unlikely everyman transformed into a gentleman and a true hero.
Mathew: Here it comes.
Helm: It provided a moment of relief from my feelings of failure where you are concerned.
Mathew: We're done here.
Mathew: You are such a jerk!
Five Flaming Swords!!
Five Flaming Swords!!
Mathew: Oh, shut up already!