Helm30 minutes or lessMathew

30 Minutes or Less

Four Flamers4 flamers

2011 Columbia Pictures. Directed by Ruben Fleischer. Running time: 83 minutes. R. Starring: Jesse Eisenberg, Aziz Ansari, Danny McBride, Nick Swardson

Mathew: This movie was awesome!

Helm: You always favor movies in which the main characters are essentially worthless slackers. In this case, both the hero and the villains.

Mathew: Yeah I like that. Because it's totally awesome!

Helm: I can see why you would empathize.

Mathew: Empathize shmempathize. This movie was hilarious.

Helm: It was filled with base humor and crude characters with little honor and less intelligence.

Mathew: Which is why it is so damn funny. Was that your point?

Helm: Not exactly.

Mathew: Look. I get that you don't approve, but I heard you laughing.

Helm: I may have snickered a bit at one or two of the japes.

Mathew: Japes? You are such an ass.

Helm: No, you are an ass.

Mathew: No, you are.

Helm: No, you are. Truly.

Mathew: What was that? Was that "truly" supposed to settle it or something?

Helm: Truly.

Mathew: Anyway, 30 Minutes or Less was more than just another comedy about dumb slackers. Sure, the characters were mostly dumb slackers, but the film itself was smart. I was really surprised by the way the film deftly slipped past the normal clich├ęs of the genre to push into fresh, new territory. Like the hit man character? That guy was hilarious. Or that bit about Netflix? Gold! Or that whole escalating war of admissions between Jesse Eisenberg and Aziz Ansari? Inspired!

Helm: Those were some funny moments, although that last one you mention was also somewhat disturbing.

Mathew: Which is exactly why it was both funny and fresh.

Helm: May I change the subject for a moment?

Mathew: Certainly. The floor is yours.

Helm: So, did I gather correctly from this film that it is currently possible to hire someone to kill a person who is causing you a problem?

Mathew: Yes. That's called a hit man. They're basically like mercenary assassins.

Helm: And they will just kill the person you want disposed of, no questions asked?

Mathew: Yeah.

Uhm... what's up with all these hit man questions, Helm?

Helm: I am simply curious. Do you suppose there are any of these mercenary assassins available for hire in this neighborhood?

Mathew: What? What are you... HEY!

That is totally uncool, Helm! Totally uncool!

helmThree FlamersThree Flaming Swords!!

mathewFive Flamers Five Flaming Swords!!

Mathew: You are an ass, truly!

Helm: I was merely curious.

Mathew: TRULY!!